Posted by Jason Lising

This Saturday, the green-clad citizens of DFW will gather on the streets of Greenville Avenue for the most ridiculous, irreverent display of public intoxication and Irish pride in Texas history. The parade is an extravagant showcase of several Dallas organizations vying for sham-rock star status. While the competition is fierce, there is an obvious lack of float building skills and serious use (or misuse) of colored tissue paper. After playing a target for beaded necklaces, you may want something else to do after the parade. If Lover’s Lane is the starting point, Lowest Greenville would serve as the day’s Mecca. It is a welcoming oasis; a break from your adventure during your drunken pilgrimage - only if you know what to look for.

The streets may seem foreign and you may lose your phone but, fear not young padawan! I am here to act as your guide, a liaison if you will. I will ensure this St Patty’s Day, no one gets left behind. I present to you, my…

TOP 10 THINGS TO DO AFTER THE PARADE (Lowest Greenville Edition)


If you haven't grown tired of #allthingsgreen yet, give Bohemian Café a try. They'll be featuring fresh-baked, green kolaches alongside other Czechoslovakian food and drink. Enjoy the rustic, Bohemian décor and listen in on many of the live band selections throughout the day. #bohemian cafe


While the owners didn't specify they'll be doing anything Irish themed for the event, you can still pick up some amazing, hand-crafted chocolates and treats. While chocolate contains plenty of anti-oxidants and helps lower your risk for cardiovascular disease, it's horrible at absorbing alcohol. Better save these desserts for after the parade! #dudesweetchocolate 

8        TRADER JOE’S

 Before you call a #lyft, make sure you stop by for all your #Dallish hangover fixins. They have everything from local, craft beers to a warm and delicious soda bread called a Blarney Stone for demonstration. Don't forget the Ibuprofen though. You'll thank me later! #traderjoes 


 Simply called, "The Rose" by Greenville Avenue locals, this place is a wonderful pit stop on your way to Lowest Greenville. Enjoy no cover, a live DJ, #greenbeer, and an open patio with plenty of room for you and all your Leprechaun friends. Doors open at 9 am for you over-achievers. #sanfranciscorose 


 Since you came out and you happen to have brought along your favorite, four-legged companion, stop by Pet Supplies Plus for some St Pat's Irish dog treats. These treats are green, delicious and sure to be a hit with your furry friend! Take home a bag today and your pet can stay Irish well after the day's festivities! #petsuppliesplus


 Are you in the mood for something cheesy? Perhaps a gigantic slice of pizza might fit the bill - or your mouth! And while you're there, they'll have #greenbeer in celebration of Ireland's favorite patron saint and a nice assortment of wings if you feel like getting dirty - and who doesn't want to get dirty? #gapco


 Despite the recent cold weather, the citizens of Greenville Ave still go bonkers for the tasty, frozen treats from Steel City Pops. Stain your tongue green with concoctions like their avocado pops or cucumber lime pops. Better yet, grab three more friends and share a four pack for $11. Or not, no one said you have to share! #steelcitypops


 I love The Libertine! Aside from the vodkas they infuse in-house and the wide selection of craft beers on tap, they confirm that #greenbeer will be flowing by the pint and there will be no shortage of #jelloshots! Yes, they'll be of the green variety as well! #libertine


 Want to experience Authentic Irish Cuisine? Well keep looking because this is Corned Beef and Cabbage, Blind Butcher style! Kick back while enjoying a wide range of cured meats and cheeses in their back patio. Also unprecedented in Blind Butcher history, they'll be opening up early than usual, promptly at noon. #blindbutcher

1        BULLZERK

 Since you're already wearing a 'pinch-proof' shirt, that's all you need, right? Actually, you can further accessorize your look with a custom koozie printed with clever quips like, '#getlucky on Greenville' and 'kiss me, I'm Dallish.' Although we can't guarantee you'll get a kiss, we can be sure you won't get pinched. Check out the live screen printing demo right in front of the store! #bullzerk